How to Know If You and Your Partner Are Compatible

Have you just started dating someone new? Wondering if he or she is really The One? Fortunately, there are ways to know if you and your partner are compatible. There are certain characteristics that make relationships last, and if yours doesn’t have them, then it might not be the best one for you to pursue. Here are some tips on how to know if you and your partner are compatible so that you can decide whether or not to take the relationship further or move on to someone else in the future.

The heart wants what it wants

No matter how hard you try, sometimes you just can’t force yourself to fall in love with someone. Love, at first sight, may be a romantic ideal, but when it comes down to brass tacks, dating someone new takes time. Take your time with each other, take things slow—and try not to let feelings pressure you into anything you don’t want. Once you give a relationship enough time for your hearts (and minds) to catch up with one another, compatibility will naturally follow. And if it doesn’t? Well, then you already know that there isn’t any real spark between you two anyway. 

There’s no right way to measure compatibility

We’re all different, so it makes sense that what works for one couple might not work for another. But, when in doubt, consider these tips. For example, if you have very different levels of energy or are looking for very different things out of life, you may want to reevaluate your relationship. Likewise, if you have incompatible views on major issues like money or religion, there’s a good chance those differences will cause problems down the road. 

In addition, couples who can’t communicate effectively—or who don’t even try—are often doomed from the start. So, be sure to pay attention to how you and your partner interact with each other; don’t just focus on big-picture items like romance or shared interests. Ultimately, compatibility is about more than just love: It also means making sacrifices for each other as well as communicating effectively.

What feels right isn’t always what looks good on paper

When you find someone you really like, it’s easy to get carried away by their charming ways. Before you start spending time with a potential love interest, try creating a compatibility checklist of everything that’s important to you in a partner—from how close you want your relationship to be, to how independent or needy they are. Creating a list will help keep your emotions from getting in the way of practicality. It’ll also give you a sense of what you have in common (and what you don’t) so that when things get serious, there won’t be any surprises. Remember: opposites attract but make for an explosive relationship!

Good relationships happen over time

To see if you and your partner are compatible, it’s important to live together before getting married. Although some couples become engaged after dating for only a few months, research shows that longer relationships are more likely to last. Living together first can help you determine whether or not marriage is right for you. It also helps you avoid marrying someone who isn’t right for you—and divorcing them later on.

Your partner knows the intimate details about your life and loves you anyway.

A loving relationship is built on trust. While some may think they’re compatible with their partner, many aren’t sure how deep that connection goes. Ask yourself these three questions: Would your partner know when you need a listening ear? Would your partner be willing to help you clean up around the house? And lastly, would your partner support you even if he or she didn’t agree with something you did? If you answered yes to all of these questions, then chances are you have found someone who is truly compatible with you.

You know that you are both making genuine efforts to make your relationship work.

One of you might be doing more than the other, but both of you are making a sincere effort to maintain and grow your relationship. And even if one or both of you is not putting in that much effort, at least one partner is trying to make it work, which means there’s no doubt that it’s worth pursuing. An easy way to tell if your partner is just not interested anymore would be if he or she consistently makes excuses for why he or she can’t meet up. 

This could mean they have lost interest in maintaining your relationship. But if they do genuinely want to see you, they will find the time. If they say I don’t have time right now, ask them what their priorities are and point out how important you are to them. Make sure they know that their actions speak louder than words—if they really care about you, then they will make time for you.

Your friends love your partner as much as you do.

It’s one thing for your parents to love your significant other. But if your friends like him or her as much as you do, there’s a good chance that relationship will last. Friends are naturally more skeptical than family members—they want you to be happy, but they won’t go easy on a person who doesn’t share their values or treats you poorly. So if you and your partner can make it through that scrutiny, you’re on good footing.

Are you compatible in the bedroom department?

Have you ever wondered if your partner was into what you like in bed? Or maybe you’re curious about whether they’re truly satisfied with what’s going on between your sheets. Figuring out if there are any major differences in preferences is a good idea, especially when it comes to your sex life. By learning how compatible you really are, then making adjustments for sexual satisfaction, both of you will have much more fulfilling experiences. 

Do they make you feel safe, secure, and respected?

We’re all individuals, with different quirks, interests, needs, and expectations. It’s not uncommon for two people who look really well suited on paper to discover that when it comes down to it, they simply don’t get along. Getting into a relationship without making sure you feel safe from harm, secure in your relationship, and respected as an individual (not just another half of a couple) is asking for trouble.

You have a similar sense of humor.

While one person’s humor might not always be another’s, if you both laugh at a lot of similar things, chances are you get along great. When people laugh together in a relationship, it builds intimacy and solidarity. There’s nothing better than a partner who makes you laugh so hard that you forget why you were upset in the first place!

You're both open to new things

Nothing can kill a relationship faster than going through it with someone who's not open to trying new things. If you and your partner are compatible, it means you're both willing to be open-minded when one of you wants to try something different, whether that's cooking a new meal or checking out a new film. Make sure your partner is open to doing new things by asking them if they'd like to go rock climbing, join an improv class, or travel abroad.

You both accept and respect each other's differences.

Couples can get into trouble when they start trying to change each other. Accepting your partner for who he or she is is a key element of being compatible. What's more, remember that you'll both be growing over time—and if you try too hard to fix someone, it can feel condescending. So while trying new things together is great, so is appreciating what you already have.

Your disagreements don't turn into full-blown arguments.

Arguments between partners can be a good thing—they signal that two people are invested in their relationship. But if you or your partner are so intense that every disagreement turns into a fight, you’re headed for trouble. Healthy couples know how to work through disagreements without yelling or arguing—it’s not easy, but it will save your relationship down the road.

You can identify each other's love language and respect it.

There are 5 love languages, and it's important to know what they are so you can determine how you want your partner to show their love for you. The first is words of affirmation when someone speaks positively about or tells you I love you. The second is quality time, which means spending one-on-one time with your partner on a regular basis. The third is receiving gifts, which shows that your partner remembers special occasions and goes out of his or her way to get something for you. The fourth is acts of service, such as doing things around the house without being asked; these actions speak louder than words that your partner cares about you. And finally, there's physical touch, like holding hands or hugging each other; often people who have been in relationships for a long time forget that physical touch matters in any relationship.

You realize that sometimes you'll get bored no matter what you do together.

Although compatibility is important, it's not everything. Sometimes, opposites attract. While opposites don't always work well together in a romantic relationship (since they have opposite needs), a couple can be perfectly compatible even if they're very different people. The same may be true for you and your partner. After all, if you're really compatible with someone, you'll love spending time with them no matter what!

Your partner's interests also interest you.

Feeling close to your partner doesn't necessarily mean you have shared interests. It's about feeling a bond with that person. That's what makes relationships work. Sure, you can do all kinds of things together as a couple, but if you're not feeling that emotional connection, then it might be time to take a step back. What are your non-negotiables? Do they include trust? A healthy sex life? Respect? Shared morals and values?

You respect each other's alone time

Make sure you both know that it's okay to spend time apart from each other. Two people who are in love should feel comfortable spending some time away from one another, whether it be with friends or family. Healthy relationships often involve a lot of alone time for both partners, so make sure you have hobbies and interests that don't include your significant other. This way you won't feel as though your relationship is lacking if your partner isn't around all the time.

You are able to forgive each other when one of you screws up or makes a mistake.

It’s impossible to expect perfection from your partner. When you realize that mistakes are just a natural part of life, you can both be more understanding and forgiving when one of you screws up or makes a mistake. After all, we all make mistakes—and it’s not always easy to admit them! But if you can both forgive each other for your shortcomings, then it might be a good sign that you and your partner are more compatible.

Talk, talk, talk

The old adage Don’t talk about religion or politics may work for some relationships, but it’s not a good rule for compatibility. As you get to know someone, it pays to be open about your interests, ambitions, hopes, and dreams. Avoiding these potentially emotional topics doesn’t make them go away. It just means that when you do discuss them, big problems might develop down the road. 

So, if you want to have a happy relationship, don’t hold back—just be honest. This also applies to what you’re looking for in a partner. Instead of playing games with your feelings, let him or her know what you expect from a relationship and how you feel about being in one. These conversations are important because they lay out expectations from both sides so there are no surprises later on. Remember: What you don’t say now can haunt you later!

Don’t Give Up On Love Too Quickly

Sometimes, when we don’t find the one right away, we can be quick to throw in the towel. It’s important to stay positive about your dating situation because not everyone is going to have a perfect meet-cute that leads straight into happily ever after. When you give up on love too quickly (before you know it isn’t going well), you could miss out on someone really great. 

Don’t give up on love too soon! Wait for The One; she or he will come along eventually. In fact, it might even happen sooner than you think... just keep an open mind and look for potential partners with care and thoughtfulness. And remember: if things aren’t working out with any given partner, maybe they weren’t meant to be—but there are plenty of other fish in the sea who might be better suited for you!

The big takeaway from all of this is simple: appreciate your partner for who they are, not who you want them to be. You'll have a better time if you're working with your partner instead of against them! Being compatible is important, but it's not the end-all-be-all of your relationship.